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maybe a new start

As i promise myself to move on

i look behind to see how far i’ve walked

only to see am stagnant at one place

for all this time , i’ve tried to make you

love me , not knowing my own worth

i searched for something , which couldn’t

be found ,some part of me which you took

and newer returned all this time ,it hurts

me to see what our lives has become

a game for one and misery for other.

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a detour

i just wish you didn’t lie to me

i’ll talk to you later when all i had is now

i couldn’t just force you to love me as i do

i ask myself not me ? that guy but why ?

i’ve had difficulty understanding my feeling

for you but only when you made it difficult

i don’t know where we are headed now ?

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where it all starts

Quarter a whiskey , happiness of life time

two ice cubes , one a friend who couldn’t be here

and another who would pour some in your glass 

as you remember those times you had spent together

and the times you wish to spent with her but you didn’t

as this year comes to an end , i wish you find someone 

whom you could just stare into the eyes and get drunk 

the one who loves you even when you sober ha ha… 

someone who loves you for not just  who you are ?

but what you could possibly become . 

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well that’s about it

sorry , is it enough ? for everything

you put me through all this time

where were you ? when i needed you

was i not good enough for you ?

or you didn’t even cared for a minute

its hard to put all these things behind me

and start walking with you again my friend

where do i go and buy the trust of mine ?

too late but i think this is the right time

to find new path to travel or to at least forgive

myself , for not understanding my own worth.

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this last time

five four three two one …….

or one two three …. four five

whichever way you like my friend

it doesn’t decrease the separation between us

this year has come to an end , may as well

this loneliness inside of me find its place to go

counting back and forth might not help

how much i am missing you right now

but sometimes , just sometimes we are

made to wait for a little too long

those eyes black as night in which moon

will float tonight , i can see some tears

searching for me , as i try to reassure

that everything will be all right ,this new year

this new beginning behold something for us

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that’s about it

A cold winter afternoon 

with some hot ginger lemon tea

I swirl it in with some warmth It gives me

and the hate it takes From beneath me

As i hope to hear from you 

I walk back and forth with

Every decision i make

Everyone problem that’s on the way

This tea , slowly just takes it away 

What is this relationship? With myself

this breeze Which battles with me 

This realization that all is not Lost

till some tea is left in the Mug served in front of me .

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Whatever it was ?

Somewhere between this right or wrong ?

your conscience get tested

maybe for better or worse but it does

the truth shall prevail they say

but who is the one passing judgement ?

have i came a little to early for my sentence

or too late did they got the convict ?

in between who i was and i am now

there is mistrust and hurt i got for love

should have known that all is lost

you caring for me was just a child’s play

that afternoon we spent together

was a lie , that smile was crooked

Am guilty for believing in everything you said

the promise we made that we will be together

didn’t last from more than a few days

i know you just too honest, so i’ll just take the blame

i just wish our love was not just another game you played.

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just the way it is

i wouldn’t mind trusting you

if it means your love ? 

i do care what you think and do

i always find you guiding me

lately , when am in fear

i maybe wrong , you might be right

that touch can’t be wrong

and that love at first sight

i might have few questions ?

but would not want to listen to the answers 

little hide and seek , we both testing each other

well its not bad once in a while

i don’t know what you expecting of me 

maybe a kiss ? or want to know some

of the lies i told you when we first met?

whatever it is , i know this love is honest

that afternoon , those messages , that smile

is reminder of your love which i’ll  cherish for a life time 

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just a bit too much

Just when i thought i found love

life just took a rebound

making me realize my position in this world

asking for love ? i think its way too much now

well i was better off alone ? unprecedented

not strong but not hurt , i had some hope left 

i had my free will , could run like an animal in wild

now everyone ‘s trying to manipulate me to run in this circus

to do things i’ve newer imagined doing

to fall for your  lies , let me have my say in this ?

that is  what happen ? when you look yourself into a

broken mirror,  its just deception , you comforting yourself

that whatever it was ? it was pure 

not realizing that it’s the shadow falling over you 

when she is not  in your sight

stop searching , if you can’t stop expecting 

i know it’s tough to say , but start to love yourself first

before  you going to let someone come and destroy you in love.

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just when i thought so

You planning to trust again 

be ready to get hurt

this pain that seeps in after seeing you

id rather go and search for something worse

i know i don’t have control over a few things

it has newer been , but i just wish you cared

cutting me with a knife slowly  , into me, through  my bones

and am expecting it would hurt less with you smiling

i know pain brings best out of people

but only if you don’t succumb to it 

you falling right on your face again

seeing your dreams being shattered into nothing, it takes less

than a few seconds between you imagining your life with her

and writing some poems about her that

 seasons change , just takes a trigger for someone

to know if they worth it or not ?

well i think i realised it too late , didn’t i ?

all what you felt , all of what you wrote ?her smile , her asking you are you

fine ? you start to question everything that has happened all along 

the picture might not be clear but i think someone is not stupid enough to

understand when they been loved and when they are used .

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A Little dance

Give your life a second chance

this music in background 

life which is passing in the foreground 

let yourself have a dance 

this experience , is more lively when experienced

than to hear a lover speak his heart out

have this potion , thank me later

for the ways it changes you , how much

better you become for someone

having that one person who will show up everyday

whether its sunny or gloomy it just makes up for

everything you been missing

don’t deprive yourself from this chance

go and have some dance.

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A January winter Night

Last chance , one last dance will you play my favorite chords again i want to

savor this moment take it with me i know we cant have all we want , but am

ready to bargain some days of life to be with you to see how surprise you

look every time i say i’ve missed you , every time you telling me ?making me

believe that you been here with me but deep down its just me who know ,

meaning of every seconds you been away from me , every time i tried to

convince myself you loved me , the same way i did , maybe you could have

taken out a little more time but i don’t think its time to complain , we can’t be

living in guilt forever , who knows what could happen tomorrow morning lets

cherish this last drink together , lets love each other as if we been newer loved

before , lets rewrite the same poem which we wrote for each other , but one

of us was busy to read it but hopefully this time , come on you come and sit

on my lap i’ve set the bonfire , its cold day of winter let me look into your

eyes playing  with your hair , thanking almighty for being so grateful , as we

talk all night , looking into each other eyes , being lost in this ethos this

feeling that all is not lost now ? do you feel the same way , whisper me in my

ears , you look more beautiful today maybe  soaking a little moon

light keeping the love ignited , eclipsing all my pain may this night newer end

, you me forever it remains .